joi, 17 septembrie 2009

Chasing pavements...

(Listening to Mozart`s "Carmina Burana")
Hey. Today is the day of both big decisions and important self-choices, I must act responsible and think as rational as possible. There`s this migration that will take place in my life. I must put behind people, feelings due to the fact that I`m leaving one place, then go to another, only to follow my interests. I only wish that they got fulfilled at a certain moment so that I won`t be forced to chase them for a longer while. I cannot plan anything, I can only be patient and patience, my friend, is a virtue!
I`ve dreamt too much lately, maybe I should be banned from doing it! But I cannot help myself, I`m doing it by default, this is the element which glues togheter my inner balance, my thoughts and my feelings...
Moreover, when I get sober from my dreams, no matter they are day dreams or real night films, I wake up thinking that I`m only chasing pavements, nothing more than that! What do I have, actually? Some of my activities are all in vain, some of them will never get accomplished, some of them are a bunch of silly ideas, some of them are about to be built in my soul and to develop strong roots, like seeds germinate in the soil... So, I guess that makes this question so difficult to answer: what do I have, in case I have anything? Inside my mind, there`s the reply: though I fear a lot, I HOPE. Sometimes I cry on the inside but I know that my reason will guide me to the right pathway.

i`m in a low mood today, I cannot smile all of a sudden. I`m dealing with a whole net of thoughts that awaits to be put in order, I`m lost in disorder!

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